Portions of Craig’s journal at Racine County Jail written in Dec 2013 while awaiting court dates.
Entry # 19. 12/3/2013. Day 48
I thank and praise you, Lord, for what you have done with my life, what You are doing with my life, and what You will do with my life. To You I give all the glory. Amen!
Entry #20. 12/4/2013. Day 49
My mind is constantly racing about the future, especially life after prison. I’m worried about being on paper, and the strict guidelines I could be on. I’m worried that I’ll get a really strict parole officer and that all he wants me to do is fail. Lord, take away these thoughts. I need your help. This is so hard. I’m not this type of person. You know the truth and my heart. Please don’t make me suffer for the rest of my life. I want to be happy again, and not put on a fake smile. Help me, Lord! Maybe once all this court stuff is done my mind will return to normal. I just want this all to be over with.
Entry #23. 12/7/2013. Day 52
Passion. What is it? It’s the love you have for something. It’s something you will do anything for. I have a passion for leading people. I have a passion for God’s wilderness. You put those together and I have a passion for leading people in God’s wilderness. Like Moses! In the book “Jesus CEO” by Laurie Beth Jones it says “Leaders are coming out of left field with a fresh perspective. Our passion may be enough to qualify us as leaders. The call to leadership can come from many directions and in many ways: 1) burning heart – the kind of call David had – the on-fire attitude when he went to fight the giant. 2) burning bush is the surprise approach to getting someone’s attention 3) burning house – risking it all for your passion. Nearly every leader in the Scriptures had doubts at one time or another. They often felt under-qualified, forsaken, or abandoned. Yet those who were called were given the strength to carry out their mission. Then as now.” I feel I have the burning heart and house. I’m ready to give it all in my calling – or I should say in my new calling. Lord, I’m ready to be called to my new field of work I have passion for.
Entry #27. 12/11/2013. Day 56
Just found out that some of my good friends are upset with everything that is going on involving me, including being upset with me. They have heard rumors in the media world and believe all they hear. I’m disappointed and very much hurt. I’ll write them letters to try and repair their wounds. I pray God can work through all of us during this time.
Entry #28. 12/12/2013. Day 57
I wish I could run again. I can’t wait for that day to run. Soon I pray. I’ve been praying for my friends lately that they hear the actual truth and not the court room lies. I’m still hurt about how it all went down. Romans 12:19 says it best, “Don’t take avenge, but let God repay.” God knows the truth and He’s in control. I’m hurt but God will take away the pain soon, I pray.
Entry #30. 12/14/2013. Day 59
Lawyer came to see me and told me that the DA is letting us debate concurrent time. But, unfortunately, I had to plead to 1 year. The DA wants 1 year extra and we are trying for concurrent. I do not want any extra time, especially a whole year extra. Lawyer doesn’t understand why the DA hates me so much; he has something against me and I don’t know why. Be with him, Lord. It could all be over on Monday, and I pray for a t least one bit of good news during this ordeal. I trust in you, Lord. Be with all in the court case and pray for no extra time. Thank you, Lord!